Hebrew 6:19 & Matthew 5:14

Wow, I have a feeling that I am going to be writing a lot. So many things I want to pour out and a few updates. I don't know where to begin?

Hmm, let's begin with the bible verses. I really love Hebrew 6:19 I discover it a few days ago when I was searching my bible and looking under the "hope" section. The verse is " We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain," I have been thinking and pondering on this for a while. I feel like for me, it is very true. I do have this undescribable hope in my heart, in God. It feels like an anchor that is deep in my soul, getting deeper and deeper. I love it, it brings me peace, it brings me joy, it brings me calm, it brings me joy. Sure you can say you have hope in nothing, based on nothing, you fool. Well then if I'm a fool, I'm a fool for life. I will never stop loving God, because I know. I KNOW that he is real. He was with me in one of my darkest hours and pulled me out when I needed him most, and that is enough right there for me to believe for enternity. In my past blog I said I can't wait to start hearing God. Well I have been hearing him all along, just not recognizing it's him. He is with me always, he helps me through my day. I talk to him all the time, there are sometimes when I have to call upon him and say Lord give me the strength to stay calm! You know how your nerves be getting worked sometimes, you just need that extra help.

The second verse is actually Nick Jonas's favorite bible verse. "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden..." I love this one because it's basically saying that we are unstoppable, that no matter how hard people or things try to bring us down they can't, because we are an unstoppable light, we are the light of the world. It also gives me hope, and helps me realize that I need to set an example for people no matter how old or young, or if they know me or not. I just wanted to touch on those two things. I have been pondering them a lot lately.

On to business, a.k.a my acting I guess you would call it career? Lol. Like I said I'm feeling this hope, I feel like things are picking up, and I feel like God has a lot in store for me. I'm pretty sure he may have mentioned that things are going to start coming my way and this was only a few weeks ago. But he told my mom like back in June, but I was still being kind of hard-headed. I've known and always knew, I guess I was kind of afraid to let myself embrace it or something? Not really sure, I'll have to get back to you on that one. Anyway, on Saturday I'm going to a casting for extras and I believe small roles? Then next Thursday I'm going to an As The World Turns casting, and also sending in my Camp Rock 2 dance audition. I am praying that one ( or all ) of these come through. If it doesn't happen, I just keep on pressing on. God will give allow me to have, what he has planned for me. My time will come.

Lastly, Christa Black I have almost read all of her blogs and wow I wish I had read them before! She has touched me in so many ways with her stories, it's almost like she just wrote some of my life and how I was feeling. It's nice to see how she has overcome that, of course with God. He healed her, and she is so right. I feel like a broken record sometimes but I just don't understand.

God can heal you, he can help you, he can make you better. You turn to worldly things for help, and they help temporarily and then what? You are lost, hurt, depressed and confused again. You need to run to God, I mean SPRINT to him, he is waiting for you. You can only deny yourself so long, and break yourself down so long. You need him, you believe in him, but you let something break you down and drive you away and keep you away. You were tricked and you were fooled, you need to see the light. I know you will one day, and I pray everyday for that.

One last thing I wanted to touch on that I learned from Christa ( I love her! ) about shame. God doesn't want us to feel ashamed, he doesn't make us feel ashamed, if you feel you are not clean enough or whatever for God it's untrue. I let go of feeling ashamed over stuff that wasn't even shameful and it felt weird, but it felt really nice. It felt right. So don't beat yourself up. Let go and let God. Wooh I wrote a lot! And a lot about God. I love him so, he just moving through me and I couldn't stop. I don't want to stop. Ever.

Much Love! - Jynnea